Grado de dificultad: 3 (Por el idioma … Porque la dificultad de un nacho es más cerca de un “0”).

Columnista: Roberto

Doritos, the noisy diet killers

Doritos turn fingers orange

Do you know Doritos? They are these orange cornmeal triangles chips that stain fingers and crunch like less expensive potato chips.

Note: technically, it is only one more brand of Mexican “nachos”.

Some use to dip them in a cheesy sauce, to add more fat to that they already contain.

A Doritos dip sauce - Origin Doritos

I got a love/hate relationship with these snacks:

  • I think they are an easy fun to add to a family reunion and they usually don’t last long.
  • However, I am very conscious of their damaging content. I know they are full of addiction-generating substances.
  • I hate that they are (not so) stealth diet killers. I also hate how they turn fingers orange.

I am lucky not to be an addict.

Loosely associated to Gaming

You may wonder how Doritos came to pop up in a TMN article. This is because they are, loosely, associated to Gaming.

Some FPS and MMOG gamers spend entire days sitting/laying on a seat/couch, chewing snacks and drinking beer/Red Bull/Coke.

Note: I already feel nauseous picturing the scene.

The microphone of their headset may, then, send disgusting crunches to their coplayers.

So, to solve this existential issue, the geniuses of Doritos had a brilliant idea:

¿What if we could cancel the nauseating cracking and chewing as they happen?

¡And they did it!

Video retrieved on Doritos UK YouTube channel

Don’t masticate with your mouth open

The software was mentioned in several articles like the following:

The sound of crunching chips is annoying. Doritos has made a silencer

And is available for free at the following link:

Doritos Silent

Now, some fun killers will argue (with no reason at all) about eating junkfood delicious Doritos while playing.

I must admit that I, sometimes, bring some snacks when gaming, because playing triggers anxiety.

I, however, always pause the game to take a treat, and I’d never talk to anyone with a filled mouth.

This must be a Boomer thing:

  • Don’t masticate with your mouth open,
  • Do not overfill your mouth,
  • Don’t talk with your mouth full of chewed food.

Note: being in a relationship helps a lot (women don’t like it much, for some reason).

Emoji Nauseated Face - Origen Apple

Civility and education ¿vintage words?

Let us call it civility and education, two vintage words ¿that Incels don’t understand? that Incels don’t understand.

Instead, Doritos decided to help these disabled people, hiding the problem (instead of curing it).

A slight problem remains, though. When they are AFK (which stands for Away From Keyboard), the noise cancelation doesn’t work anymore …

That is what some psychology support groups are trying to address, like the one called, casually, Away From Keyboard.

Very diplomatically suggested, the message is: “Get a life”.

As it happens, many people are Gamers too. The difference is that they built their life instead of filling their computer with bloatware … And their keyboard with Doritos crumbs.

¿Is cancelling Doritos noise genius?